Posts Tagged ‘Children’

Well, this morning, the Beardess went out of town, leaving Baby Gurr and myself alone, all by ourselves. Yep, we getting out and tearing this town up. Got a whole case of apple juice and prune juice for baby Gurr and some beerses for myself.

We gotta go out and buy some stuff. Then come home and do some stuff. And then we gotta guard the blue bird box. Hopefully the invasive birds that live next door will show up for eradication.

So the Beardess did not leave any special instructions when she left. So this is awesome, because that means I have free reign to make the decisions in which I decide are the proper decisions.

Morning cartoons changed a little from the usual boring cartoons. Some Spongebob, and King Of the Hill.


Got a while day planned, soil for the garden and yard, Lowes Home Improvement, bird fee, the plant nursery, and maybe a lunch somewhere. Chinese Buffet maybe. Golden Corral. I don’t know yet, but something in that genre. Not sure which one, because both, do not have very good food. Maybe Firehouse, cause they know how to heat up some meat and pile it on a tasty piece of bread.

I tried to tell Audrey about this weekend since she was born. I knew it would happen one day! I have a special wardrobe chosen for myself. But to make it complete, we are going to Tractor Supply and maybe pick up some matching flannel and jeans. If you don’t like flannel, your heart is made of coal and pumps loser juice through your veins.

Oh yeah, it was Valentines Day yesterday. Baby Gurr came home with Valentines. Gonna sit down with her and go over them. Some learning to do about this holiday. Go ahead and teach her bout boys, and they must pass certain tests to be able to give her Valentines. But I can not reveal these tests, they are secret.

Gotta run, poopy diaper.

No Shave Never


My baby gurr (daughter Audrey) will be two years old in February, the third to be exact. No longer will I tell her age by months. Now, she will be aged in years and halves. I round up.

I believe at this age, children should start learning about cooking and fire. Mainly cooking on or with fire. You can never start teaching fire safety too early in life. Beginning to teach fire safety early will probably prevent the woods behind your house catching fire. By catching I mean your child lighting the woods afire.

I was taught how to use matches, but never taught where not to set shit on fire. So the woods behind my house burnt a few times.

I do a lot of grilling. My wife bought me a Big Green Egg last year for my birthday. Best gift ever! And that grill is worth every penny. I told Sara last week, I was going to be proud as hell the first time I come home and Audrey (daughter) has the EGG rolling smoke. I am sure it will rank up there with the first time she catches a fish or bags a duck or deer.

So in preparing for this glorious day, I am starting my pre-draft to the Syllabus. This is what I have so far.
Meat, Big Green Egg (EGG), fire.
Put fire in in EGG, put meat in EGG.
A few more points I will have to hit, but these are by far the most important.

If you see that I might be missing something let me know.


No Shave Never