Posts Tagged ‘Love’

Yesterday at work, we were sitting at the table eating lunch. Start thinking about the places you have been and some of the amazing bits of information that you learned. Dig deeper, and really look at how amazing the enlightenment was considering the situation in which maybe you were not looking to become enlightened, but it just happened because it was amazing. See, some of y’all might have just become enlightened as hell, or either confused as a cat in a room of vacuums.

You never know when something being said or done in everyday conversation might turn out to be the clarifier of life. Those questions you might have, or other people, like; what is the meaning of life, where is the end of the universe, how do I grow a beard?

That’s the thing about Bearders, we “see the light” because the beard allows us to tap into our inner being. We tend to be more laid back, let it come to me and do its thing. But we can also be spontaneous, wild and crazy.

Some people might now know how to grow a beard, they haven’t seen the light. You don’t necessarily have to “see” something, you could hear it too. As this co worker progressed into his story on how to grow a beard, he said he Googled it. What he saw on Google absolutely blew his mind. He couldn’t comprehend. The way to grow a beard, was to just quit shaving.

Yep, that’s all, just quit shaving. Stop, done, no more. Now he says he mis-spoke, and may have. But there’s a life lesson to be learned, Don’t think what you speak won’t be thought differently once you speak it.

But the main life lesson, quit shaving grow a damn beard, make a woman smile!

Paul

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No Shave Never

My family, my beard and a big doughnut. The doughnut has a hole in it, y’all know that. Inside that hole is nothing, hence it being called a “hole”. Now, in case y’all don’t know, the part of the doughnut that fills that hole is called a “doughnut hole”. Why it’s called a hole when there’s actually no hole at all is quite dumbfounding. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, go to a doughnut shop and ask for doughnut holes and a doughnut. You can figure it out from there.

My loving wife, Sara, is my doughnut hole. I’m the doughnut. Hold that doughnut parallel to the ground and drop anything through that hole. It will fall straight thru, to the ground. Unless the object is bigger than the hole. If you do that, this experiment doesn’t count, you lose! That’s my brain, forgetting. Sara is the doughnut hole, reminding me, not to forget.

I have been wanting to do a yearly recap of our household for a couple years now. For numerous reasons I have not done that. The main reason being my skill of forgetfulness. I’m one of those people who knows I will forget information. I have tried to negate this by acquiring and implementing anti-forgetfulness skills. What I have learned, is that when you forget shit, doing more things to help you remember, creates a plethora of more shit to forget.
Example: Writing items down on a piece of paper, to remind you to do those items in the near future. Yeah, that doesn’t work when you forgot you wrote them down and now you can’t find that piece of paper. Ironically you find it a day later while cleaning your pockets out before doing laundry. Y’all know that saying, “a day late…”.

Now, I just rely on my wife and her keen instinct of knowing I’m forgetful, she keeps me straight. When we travel, after every stop we get ready to leave she asks me, “got your wallet, phone?”. I think it’s just one of those motherly instincts she has programmed herself to do with her husband. I am willing to bet many of you know exactly what I’m talking about.

Sometimes my wife has two youngins to remind. Our two year old and me. She does not remind me often, but she does remind me regularly, that I’m a big kid. Instinctively she knows exactly what I’m going to forget during certain activities. It is quite amazing. The funny part is, I will forget simple things. Sunglasses, wallet, phone, but never forget my thermos or coosie. I call this here disorder, Adult Male Selective Prioritization Inefficiency.

I am very thankful for Sara and her ability to know me, better than I know myself. She does remind me of that fact regularly, deservedly so. Someone needs to create a reminder app, that can be tailored to remind me of stuff in the manner my wife does. Then I wouldn’t forget to turn the alerts on, volume up, and have more than one notification.

I’m sure many of you will understand this dynamic. Husbands, remind yourselves to tell your wives “thank you” regularly. Add that to the list of “wife things” you should never forget, birthday, anniversary, first date, favorite ice cream, favorite drink, favorite candy and favorite restaurant.

Remembering these things will make your beard growing experience much easier. Most importantly it will keep your wife happy, and you won’t have to worry about her not reminding you to breathe. Because men, they sometimes will forget that shit too.

A good photo for reminding us not to forget our sanity.

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No Shave Never.

Bacon. Love makin’

Posted: November 9, 2012 in Grilling/Cooking
Tags: , , ,

Let’s talk about Bacon and why, in all it’s glory, it’s the best food ever.
Bacon makes everything better. I mean, you ever eaten bacon and not been happy? There a dish you really don’t like, add bacon. BAM! Deliciousness.
Going through a breakup? Baconator from Wendy’s. Fired from your job? Eat a pound of bacon and grits. Kids driving you nuts? Bacon for them, bacon and whiskey for you.
Southerners probably have childhood memories of walking into grandma’s house, the smell of bacon being cooked in that old cast iron pan. Pure joy.
Women, having a tough time finding a good man? Fry up some bacon on that first date.
What’s your favorite bacon recipe?

Stay bearded my friends.